That’s the discussion I’ve been having with myself the last 72 hours. Short. To the point. And true.
I received some tough news on Monday. I misinterpreted what the doctor meant 2 weeks ago when she said she ‘hopes to have me walking before it snows.’ I thought that meant walking without the boot, so I did some math: if I”ll be in the boot for at least 2 months after I’m off crutches & she’s hoping I’m walking before it snows – say December – then maybe I can be off crutches by the end of September. So I thought. I was wrong.
I found out Monday she meant OFF CRUTCHES before it snows! She said my goal of end of September was probably not realistic & she’d be ‘ecstatic’ if it’s by my birthday in mid-November. So…now let’s do the math….let’s say end of November off crutches. Add 2 months. Now it’s end of January before I can even think about getting in a normal shoe. And my date of injury was 2/25/06.
Which leads to my discussion with myself. To say I was discouraged is an understatement. I was down. I was VERY discouraged – not quite depressed but I was about as down as I’ve been. All the positive attitude up to this point tanked. Quickly.
Through a course of events I’ve come to grips with the fact that God wants me on crutches & with limited mobility for a while longer. And it’s a heart issue – to let Him be God and me be His child. My job is to submit and trust Him – that He will work it all out for His good. Funny – our pastor has been teaching on Ephesians & he’s into Eph. 3 and ahs been talking about this very thing the last 2 weeks. Now I have a perfect object lesson: why do I do what I do? Who controls me? Am I a prisoner of Christ? Who controls my circumstances? Who controls me?
If I truly believe that God is God and in COMPLETE control then I have to just rest….or, as I’ve told myself – ‘just shut up & deal.’ It won’t get better until God wants it better; so just ‘shut up and deal.’
Or to sound spiritual about it:
ISA 45:9 “Woe to the one who quarrels with his Maker– An earthenware vessel among the vessels of earth! Will the clay say to the potter, ‘What are you doing?’ Or the thing you are making say, ‘He has no hands’?
ISA 64:8 But now, O Lord, Thou art our Father, We are the clay, and Thou our potter; And all of us are the work of Thy hand.
JER 18:6 “Can I not, O house of Israel, deal with you as this potter does?” declares the Lord. “Behold, like the clay in the potter’s hand, so are you in My hand, O house of Israel.
So I’m just going to get back to enjoying the ride. Come with me, won’t you? It’s a wonderful view when you know Who’s driving!
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